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Saturday, June 23, 2012

Let's Talk About You, Baby! Let's Talk About You and Me!

Written By: Ooh La La (Danielle Marie)

Why do we want to avoid meeting new people?

Why do we dread stepping out of our small social circles?

Why are awkward conversations so common? 

And why do we want to avoid social interaction altogether?

These may seem to be complicated long-winded questions, but they are not!  Meeting new people and those social situations are awkward because of the lack of common sense and the lack of generosity.  It's more apparent than you think!  Instead of making others feel comfortable, we do the opposite.  We talk about ourselves, and then we talk about ourselves some more, and then maybe we ask one question about their personal lives, but before they complete an answer, we talk about ourselves some more!  Get the point?  Get over yourself!

Instead of focusing on yourself, focus on others and this makes those horribly awkward social situations ever so much more enjoyable.  You may not really care to know what that woman's professional career entails or if that couple's children attend a private school, but they will be happy to share and surprisingly you may have more things in common than you realized.  The other bonus, they will eventually ask about your life.  This doesn't mean go crazy and tell them everything about you and your latest endeavors, leave a little bit of mystery.  You may need to pick up the conversation later in the evening or at another event sooner than you think.

Stop trying to one-up everyone you meet!  You would be surprised that most people don't care if you have the latest Chanel bag, or new car, or where you go grocery shopping, or that your baby got their front teeth early!  It is so obvious that you are trying too hard!  Keep your mouth shut and have a little humility.  People are more willing to befriend those who don't need to put on an exhibition! 

So what's the lesson?  Have you not been listening?  Think about others, ask questions, try at least to act interested.  You will be surprised how fast this will turn an awkward conversation around.  And maybe, you might find yourself enjoying the conversation.  It can be a relief not talking about yourself, take yourself out of the spotlight!  Let's be real, who wants to interact with fake and self-absorbed individuals?  Show some interest in others, even if you never see those people again, that conversation may have an impact on their lives (in a good way). 

Now how do you leave that lasting impression?  SMILE!  It really isn't that difficult and will have a surprising effect on others!

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